Bentley are Boring me to Death

"Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge)" (thejonnyedge) 03/09/2014 at 17:40 • Filed to: BORING BENTLEY, BAD REVIEWS, AM I MEAN?

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... and being 'cute' is no excuse for a poor review.

I like to think of myself as quite a polite and positive bloke. I don't believe I dish out criticism where it's not deserved, and equally I think I offer praise where it is deserved. !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! Now it is the turn of both Bentley, and Fast Lane Daily to face my criticism.

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The Bentley Continental has remained essentially unchanged since 2003. This isn't acceptable. Eleven years down the road and Bentley still try to pass off the latest Continental to us as exciting and fresh and with an update or whatever. It's all idle chat to me because basically what it is, is a 2003 car being sold for a 2014 price. Ridiculous. Why do you even bother wasting our time bringing it to motor shows?

You can dress it up however you like Bentley, but the Continental is not even interesting, never mind exciting. It's absolutely mind numbingly boring and completely devoid of any form of personality whatsoever. You've had ten years to work on a new shape or just something different based on this model, you've even worked with Zagato for goodness' sake.

I don't doubt your quality and finish, and the sheer class of your cars. I've been in one, it was very well put together and highly refined but I struggle, really struggle to see how it can cost over £100,000. I could not escape the thought in my head which was that it's a lottery winning Volkswagen Passat which has bought itself a nice new carpet and some furniture, suddenly become interested in horse racing, and got addicted to steroids. Classy, but I do not see why you need to buy one. I just don't get it.

From time to time you should look to do something to generate some excitement in your brand. Where is the spark? When was the last time Bentley did anything worth getting excited about?

This brings me onto the review I've posted above. Fast Lane Daily. I can forgive Derek D, he makes me smile for some reason and I actually think I'd get along really well with him if I met him. I think he's a good guy and he's very engaging. What I absolutely cannot forgive is making 'cute' girls do car reviews, thereby fooling the majority of testosterone-fueled viewers into thinking it was a good review because 'she has a nice accent' or 'she has nice hair'. It's poor. Just because you get more comments (and therefore possibly more income? somebody tell me if this is right) by putting marginally attractive female reviewers in the car does not mean you actually should. Why? Because they are downright poor at what they do.

I do believe there are some very good female car reviewers out there, and automotive media definitely needs more female faces. Poor old Sarah Sauer is also speaking in her second language and I'm keen to enforce that is impressive. She speaks great English and she works as a reviewer in Germany from what I understand, but the last two reviews she has done are not good at all. Pretending that they are by writing cheesy brown-nosey comments underneath the video are not going to help her. Who are you trying to impress? It's like being at one of those parties with a boy girl ratio of 20:1.

I want to reassure you now that I'm not actually just picking on Sarah. I feel for her a bit because I have a feeling she's got herself into this and now been dropped into it by FLD with little or not support from their side. I'm speculating though. This leads me onto Christina Thompson. Tell me if you think this is a good review and WHY.

Part of the problem is the presentation, yes. Why is there always some awful music playing in the background? Short of equipment to record good sound perhaps? I don't know. Anyway, this review was overly positive and vague. I didn't really learn much about this car and it was delivered a little bit like it was read from a sheet.

It's over to you guys now. Let me know what you think. Am I being fair? Am I being harsh? Am I just a miserable grumpy old git? I'd like to know where you stand. I think I'm fair, if I'm not I'm trusting you guys to tell me. As always, thanks for reading!

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Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager > Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) 03/09/2014 at 18:53

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When it comes to Bentleys, go big or go home.

Somethingwittyer likes noisy > Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) 03/09/2014 at 19:39

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There's a reason they call it the rich man's Camary.

Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) > Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager 03/09/2014 at 19:43

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Quite. I take it that's a vote in my favour?

Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager > Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) 03/09/2014 at 19:49

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Most definitely, especially since I've actually driven one. It rides like a magic carpet and pulls like a battleship.

Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) > Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager 03/09/2014 at 19:53

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Nice. Respect! The big ones are regal. It's the Continental that winds me up.

Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager > Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) 03/09/2014 at 19:57

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I used to live in Miami, I know that feel. Every rich trophy wife or wannabe hip hop artist driving around South Beach had one. It was beyond ridiculous.

Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) > Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager 03/09/2014 at 20:01

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It's just the way that 11 years on they still bring it to motor shows and try and pass something off as new or different. It's boring, it's overpriced, and it's old. I really don't get the appeal.

I had a good look around a new Mulsanne at Goodwood this year and that was beautiful, I felt so English when I was in it!

Nighthawkwill7, Hoon Depot Manager > Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) 03/09/2014 at 20:15

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It has a massive road presence, it felt odd being the center of attention of so many people but in a cool way.

X-cchannel-M > Jonny Edge (@thejonnyedge) 03/11/2014 at 10:19

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Why would you want to change perfection? Drool........

Seriously, the nipped and tucked Continental GT is one of the most beautiful automotive works of art on the road. And you probably should drive one before passing judgement on it.